You’re back! I’m so glad. We were only getting started in part one. In that article we looked at the first steps in breaking free from the dieting cycle – accepting that a desire for weight loss is at this vicious cycle’s core, and working on establishing alternative, non-weight-centric goals.
In this article we’ll look at dealing with some of the difficulties that can come with breaking the cycle and the importance of getting to know your body, loosening up and starting to trust yourself. Ready?
Okay, so, I’ve established my non-weight goals and I’ve got a list of things I’d like to see change with my health, and I am slowly getting better at noticing the unhelpful thoughts that would ordinarily keep the dieting cycle turning… But…
If I’m not on a diet, how do I know I’m eating the right things?
Great question! After following diets and plans for a while (for some of us, all our adult life) it can be difficult to know where to start when it comes to eating “normally” (whatever that means!). This is partly because we are conditioned to look at external cues, like a meal plan, and not internal cues, like what our body is telling us it needs.
Tuning in to our body’s cues takes time and practice. It also involves a willingness to change tack.
Aim to tune in to your body’s cues with curiosity, rather than judgment. What does it feel like to be hungry? To be full? Where in your body are these feelings felt – can you point to a specific place? How does your body feel when you make changes to your diet (e.g., energised, lethargic, constipated, regular)?
Thinking about what you would like to eat, rather than what you’re allowed to eat is also an important step. When we take away the rules of a diet, we are left with the choice to eat whatever we want. There are of course guidelines that can help us make healthy choices, but in the first instance when you are trying to break free from the dieting cycle it is often more beneficial to look internally, rather than go looking for guidelines that can easily be made into new rules. Think about what food you might enjoy. Is there a meal you’ve told yourself you can’t have but really like? Is there a snack food you’ve avoided for years that you miss? No food is out of bounds (so long as you’re not allergic to it of course!).
But if I’m allowed to eat anything, I will eat ANYTHING!
Yes, and? Bear with me here – I’m not being contrary for the sake of it. It’s worth questioning why this is so scary.
If you told yourself that you could eat anything, at any time, in any amount, and your response wasn’t “woo-hoo!”, why is that? It can be hard to dig deeper, especially when we are so used to looking at external cues to guide us along, but it is important to reflect on why we reacted in that way. Could it be fear that we will never stop eating? Fear that we will only ever choose food that is “bad” for us? Fear of being out of control? Could it be a lack of trust in ourselves to “do it right”?
There is no right or wrong answer here – being honest with yourself and taking the time to examine where this reaction came from can really help to unravel the tricky parts of breaking the dieting cycle, the parts that involve uncharted territory.
And there is absolutely no reason that you must do this alone!
My job as a dietitian stretches beyond simply talking about what you are eating, and focuses on how and why you are eating. Remember, the only person that lives in your body is you. While I can’t do the digging deeper for you, I can help to navigate these tricky conversations and offer an alternative to the dieting cycle. Once you have some awareness around your actions, attitudes and beliefs, the path to permanently breaking the dieting cycle becomes clearer.
Have you ever told a child they can’t have or do something (e.g., TV time), only to find them sneaking it later (e.g., climbing the shelves to get the remote)? While we often attribute this rebellious behaviour to children, we don’t tend to grow out of it as adults. So, the more you tell yourself “I can’t”, “I shouldn’t”, or “I won’t” about a food, the more you feed that voice in your head that says, “but I want to”. The more we feed the voice, the stronger and louder it gets, until it’s too loud to ignore and no amount of “can’t”, shouldn’t” or “won’t” can stop us eating the “off-limits” food. Essentially, willpower is a finite resource, which partly explains why it’s so hard to stick to restrictions long-term.
So, rather than spending our energy telling ourselves we can’t have something when we feel like it, we can instead – stay with me here – eat the food. Perhaps we might choose to eat the food slowly, savouring every bite, enjoying the thing we felt like eating and then… Well, move on with life!
Saying yes to something that we feel isn’t the healthiest choice is not failing or losing our willpower, it’s enjoying life! Funnily enough, when we accept these foods as legitimate choices, they tend to lose their shine a little. No longer the rebellious choice, they can lose their foothold in our thoughts and on their own become sometimes foods – not because we’re not allowed to have them all the time, but because we simply don’t feel like having them all the time.
SO, you’re saying eat what you want when you want it and you’ll get enough nutrition?
Essentially, yes. But doing this needs to happen on a foundation of body trust and understanding, not out of nowhere. If you have spent the time understanding your body’s cues, accepting that it will tell you how it’s going if you let it and really tuning in to what it has to say, you put yourself in a great position to nourish yourself as needed. How can I be so sure, I hear you ask? Because humans are born with this ability.
Children, before they are influenced by the world, are very good at nourishing themselves. Ever tried to feed a young toddler that isn’t hungry? Their lips are like concrete! Nothing’s getting in! Ever tried to delay feeding a baby that is hungry? Do you still have intact eardrums, because those cries get LOUD! We are born with innate mechanisms that help us eat what we need to thrive; this has been shown time and time again in many studies over the years.1-4
While we may no longer be innocent kids automatically tapping into our bodies’ cues, it is possible to re-learn how to listen to what our body has to say and harness the innate ability to feed ourselves well.5-7
Are you ready to give it a go?
Join me for the final instalment in this trilogy, where we build on this new take on looking after ourselves. Spoiler alert: it involves taking things slowly!
When changing tack from a weight-centric goal to one that can help you break the dieting cycle, it’s normal for you to have some sticking points. Having a support person to talk through your questions and concerns and to build skills with can make the process so much easier and enjoyable!
So don’t wait! Book in today! Stefanie is here to support you all the way with individualised advice.
References:
- Fox MK, Devaney B, Reidy K, Razafindrakoto C, Ziegler P. Relationship between Portion Size and Energy Intake among Infants and Toddlers: Evidence of Self-Regulation. J Am Diet Assoc. 2006;106(1):77-83.
- Birch LL, Deysher M. Conditioned and unconditioned caloric compensation: evidence for self-regulation of food intake by young children. Learn Motiv.1985;16:341–55.
- Birch LL, Deysher M. Calorie compensation and sensory specific satiety: Evidence for self-regulation of food intake by young children. Appetite. 1986;7(4):323-331.
- Birch LL, Johnson SL, Andresen G, Peters JC, Schulte MC. The variability of young children’s energy intake. N Engl J Med. 1991 Jan 24;324(4):232-5.
- Ciampolini M, Bianchi R. Training to estimate blood glucose and to form associations with initial hunger. Nutr Metab (Lond). 2006 Dec 8;3:42.
- Schaefer JT, Magnuson AB. A Review of Interventions that Promote Eating by Internal Cues. J Acad Nutr Diet. 2014;114(5):734-760.
- Johnson SL. Improving Preschoolers’ Self-Regulation of Energy Intake. Pediatrics. 2000;106 (6):1429–1435.
